- Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter. ~Mark Twain
- Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
- Old age isn’t so bad when you consider the alternative. ~Maurice Chevalier, New York Times, 9 October 1960
- There was no respect for youth when I was young, and now that I am old, there is no respect for age – I missed it coming and going. ~J.B. Priestly
- The great secret that all old people share is that you really haven’t changed in seventy or eighty years. Your body changes, but you don’t change at all. And that, of course, causes great confusion. ~Doris Lessing
- I recently had my annual physical examination, which I get once every seven years, and when the nurse weighed me, I was shocked to discover how much stronger the Earth’s gravitational pull has become since 1990. ~Dave Barry
- First you forget names, then you forget faces, then you forget to pull your zipper up, then you forget to pull your zipper down. ~Leo Rosenberg
- The years between fifty and seventy are the hardest. You are always being asked to do more, and you are not yet decrepit enough to turn them down. ~T.S. Eliot, quoted in Time, 23 October 1950
- Don’t worry about avoiding temptation – as you grow older, it starts avoiding you. ~Author Unknown
- They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body. ~Author Unknown
- Like a lot of fellows around here, I have a furniture problem. My chest has fallen into my drawers. ~Billy Casper, about golf’s Senior Tour
- One of the best parts of growing older? You can flirt all you like since you’ve become harmless. ~Liz Smith
- I don’t do alcohol anymore – I get the same effect just standing up fast. ~Author Unknown
- Old age ain’t no place for sissies. ~Bette Davis
- In dog years, I’m dead. ~Author Unknown
- The best thing about getting old is that all those things you couldn’t have when you were young you no longer want. ~L.S. McCandless
- Age is like the newest version of a software – it has a bunch of great new features but you lost all the cool features the original version had. ~Carrie Latet
