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Category: Humor

My Mother’s Aging Poem


By Geraldine K. Purse

The body gets stiff, you get cramps in your legs

Corns on your feet as big as hen’s eggs,

Gas in your stomach, elimination is poor

Take Ex-lax at night, but then you’re not sure.

You soak in the tub or the body will smell,

It’s just like I said: OLD AGE IS HELL!

The teeth start decaying, eyesight is poor,

Hair falling out all over the floor,

Sex life is shot, it’s a thing of the past,

Don’t kid yourself, friends, even that doesn’t last.

Can’t go to parties, don’t dance anymore

Just putting it mildly, you’re a hell of a bore.

Liquor is out, can’t take a chance

The bladder is weak, might pee in your pants.

Nothing to plan for, nothing to expect

Just the mailman bringing your Security check.

Now, be sure your affairs are in order and you will is made right

Or on the way to your grave, there’ll be a hell of a fight.

So, if this year you feel fairly well,

Thank God you’re alive, although Old AGE IS HELL.

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Annoying Stuff

At the top of my list is my neighbor. The yard is trashed and I can’t imagine what the inside of the house looks like. There are dogs, cats and chickens roaming around. Worst of all there are 2 small children living there.

Healthcare: We have a hospital not too far from us in Caldwell, ID which is handy for emergencies, but if you need certain procedures or surgery you will most likely need to go to Boise or Meridian.  Why can’t the Doctors do the traveling?

TV Weather Reports: There are 3 TV stations in Boise. On any given day none of them agree on temperatures or precipitation percentages. They all say they are the best at projections. Who is right? Maybe they should have a conference call each morning. I was going to point out the differences in the photo below, but it’s obvious.

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